The ending of one year and the beginning of a new one is always a time for me to reflect on my life and what God has done in my life. When I look back on 2011 I am in awe of his work.
Those of you that know Pat and I,know that growing our family has never been a simple task. I always thought it would be. You grow up get married and have kids, that easy right? Unfortunately for us and so many other family it's not that simple.
Soon after Pat and I married we decided to start a family (we had already dated for 7years). Month after month past and no big news to announce. It was about that time that most people we knew were announcing their big news. We reached the year mark in trying to conceive and to our surprise we got pregnant!! WhooHoo! It appeared to be all part of God's amazing plan, we had just gotten settled in Charlotte so it seemed like perfect timing. We were on top of the world for a short 2 weeks until we miscarried:( Why would God allow this to happen? That is one answer I won't have until I get to heaven when I not only get to meet my creator but my precious baby also. At that time we were church hunting and I believe God led us to Hickory Grove the Sunday following our miscarriage. The sermon was about loving,trusting and praising God through troubled times. I remember them singing "Bleesed be the name of the Lord". When the line "You give and take away,but my heart will choose to say Blessed be your name" I knew than that without a doubt Pat and I were on a journey and no matter what Happened we would choose to trust our God!
We under went every test there was, all coming back with normal results yet still no pregnancy in sight. It wasn't the best of times but in some ways it was. Pat and I began growing as a family of three-Pat,me and God! Would we have grown as much spiritually if this trial had not come our way? I'm not so sure of that.
Long story short after 3 years and multiple IUI procedures, we were blessed with our amazing son Cameron!! Life with Cameron in our lives is simply awesome! We thank God for him everyday. Watching him grow is amazing. He's the cutest,funniest and sweetest little guy I know!
Well next came trying for baby #2. As we learned with Cameron, the best things in life don't come easy. We attempted for a few more years which us to the beginning of 2011. We had decided to switch doctors due to my insurance as a CHS employer gave me 100% coverage for fertility treatments. A blessing from God in itself! It was there we learned some heartbreaking news about my reproductive status that decreased my odds to conceive drastically. It was than that after a lot of prayer and discussions between Pat and I that we decided to undergo IVF. This had never been on the todo list but now it seemed our only hope.
We began 2011 with great anticipation. We felt an overwhelming peace from God that it was okay to proceed down the IVF path and were excited to hopefully get pregnant. Fromnthe beginning we could feel the Lord's hand on this procedure. Everything went smoothly. We weren't expected to have a lot of eggs and that was fine with us. We had prayed for only the amount that the Lord wanted us to have. Well the number was 2! Could we possibly have twins, oh my! Hey if that is what God had planned than bring it on! So for the first two months of 2011 all we could think about was the possibility of 3 young ones in the house.
I guess it was maybe silly to have been so hopeful after all the years of disappointment , butnthat had always been how we handled our infertility with renewed hope each month because we knew with God all things were possible.
Well it came as a crushing blow when we relealized that we would not be knowing these to babies here on earth either. Even our precious 3 year old could understand that mommy was sad she couldn't give him a brother or sister:(
Wow, for some reason I didn't see that being God's plan. I mean Pat and I both clearly could feel God all over the procedure. As the 2011 progressed the Lord started revealing to us his plan for our growing family and that he indeed was with us just with different plans than our own.
While we were trying to decide and praying about trying IVF again or what did God want us to do he began to show us in no uncertain terms what his plan was.
That plan was Adoption!
Hmm, well it was always there as a possible backup plan but we never really chose to make it anything more than that. Could we do it? Could we love an adopted child as much as our biological son? God clearly answered all these questions with an astounding YES! He began to Open our eyes wide and the topic of adoption was everywhere we turned. At times we couldn't help but be amazed at how often it happened. We were finally like okay God we get and Yes.
So as 2011 comes to and end and a bright new year is to here to embrace we find ourselves in the same spot we started the year, anticipating our growing family!
We are excited to be the majority of the way through the paper pregnancy of our adoption process and anticipate with great joy meeting our adopted daughter from China!
If you ever question if God really knows you I can attest that he knows you better than you know yourself. You see God was in fact with us during our IVF but not so that we could carry those children to term but so that we could have closure in knowing we did all we could and have no regrets. Having that closure is what has enabled us to not only hear but embrace God's call on our life to adopt. I am certain it will change not only our daughter's life but her daddy,mommy and brother's life in an amazing way!
Thank you God for giving us the gift of having the opportunity to adopt!
I look forward to keeping you posted on our progress! Please keep our family in your prayers- all four of us:)
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