I am happy to report that our Dossier was received in Beijing,China on April 16,2012. Yay!, it feels like a huge accomplishment after months of paperwork. Next step is waiting, praying and preparing for getting the phone call with a referral for our sweet daughter. How long will this waiting time take? If I only knew, but only God knows that perfect moment. Our agency estimates that for our requests and medical conditions we have agreed to be open to that our wait time might be 6-12 months. They can't predict what and when they receive referrals so there really is no way of knowing when the call will come. I'm kinda going with the plan of expecting it to take awhile but being prepared for it to happen tomorrow!
It's amazing how many thoughts and emotions go through my head regarding our adoption on a daily basis all while going through my normal routine of working, and taking care of the two special men in my life. On any given day I can think about what my sweet girl may look like, whether she is born yet, is she still with her birth mom or is she living at the orphanage.i think about what kinds of needs will she have medically,physically,and emotionally, what will it be like on Gotcha Day and how will Cameron adjust? These are just a few of the thoughts in my head.
Lately, I have been thinking a lot about my daughter's birth mom. I have always felt a sense of gratitude for the choose she has or will make to carry my child to term and giving her life.Over the past week I have begun to think about what she may be going through having to make the choice to give up, or even possibly abandon the child that grew in her womb. I came across a book that tells the story of a birth mom in India and the adopted mom in America.
Upon giving birth to her first daughter the child was immediately killed by the father just simply for being a girl. When she gave birth to her second daughter she walked for miles only a day after giving birth to take her to an orphanage choosing to give her up in order to save her life. Her third pregnancy resulted in a boy which all her family rejoiced over and acted as if it were her first child. This mom although loved her son so had to live with the sadness and loss of her daughters all alone.
This really has made me grieve for my daughter's birth mom. Will she always feel a sense of loss and emptiness over her child. Having had the opportunity to have been pregnant with Cameron I can not even imagine having to live my life without him. That pain would be indescribable.
So as I pray for my daughter I also pray for the women that chose to give her life. I pray the the Lord will give her peace in life to know that there is a mommy, a daddy and a big brother on the other side of the world loving her with all our hearts. It is ironic that what will probably be the hardest thing in this women' life will result in one of the greatest things in my life. It just goes to show that only God and him alone can see the whole picture in life.
I close will a conversation I had with Cameron . I was explaining how his sister would not grow in my belly but in another mommy's belly but that mommy wouldn't be able to care for her. After looking at my with surprise he said,"well that's ok mama because she will have me for a brother and you for a mommy so she will be real happy!" :) From the mouths of babes comes the childlike faith we all should hold dear no matter what our age.
Christmas Blessings
Sunday, April 22, 2012
Saturday, February 4, 2012
Update on the Adoption Process
There are many things in life that can teach us patience and the adoption process is defiently one of those things. Our agency refers to the paper collecting phase as the "paper pregnancy" and is just that. It takes time to prepare everything just like it take time for a baby to grow in the womb. One of the exceptions is that with this "pregnancy" I don't have to gain weight! (sometimes you gotta look for the rainbow in situations).
Well since my last post we found out that our Home Study was approved by our agency! Yay :) We received 3 notarized copies, 1 for the Dossier, 1 to keep and 1 that we sent to the USCIS (United States Citizenship and Immigration Services) This is the next phase in our waiting process. We have been warned by our agency that the time frame for the USCIS to process our paperwork from start to finish can be 1-3 months. This process includes them sending us a letter with an appointment for biometric fingerprints and than we receive a very important letter that is one of the most important documents that we will travel to China with. It will allow us to bring our baby girl back with us! So even though we are possibly three months away from receiving this very important letter the good news is that once we do receive it than we will have all the documents needed to complete our dossier. We have learned that baby steps our better than no steps at all.
As we wait for the government to check us out we have begun transitioning our home to make room for our new addition. It has always been the plan to have Pat's current office space as our second child's room. So we are making some changes and small renovations to go ahead and move Pat's office downstairs ( which I think he is totally stoked about). We are not naive in knowing that we may be waiting awhile for a referral for a child but we also don't want to wait and than be rushing to get everything done at one time. It melts my heart to walk into Pat's office now and know that one day we will finally have another child sleeping there.
This room is just across from Cameron's and he is very excited that their rooms will be so close. He has already told me how he will help her feel safe if she gets scared at bedtime. I can't wait for him to be a big brother!
So as we still have time to go, looking back at where we started we can see how far we've come. We can't control how long a lot of this process takes so we wait knowing that God already knows the day, and the hour that our child will be put into our arms.
Well since my last post we found out that our Home Study was approved by our agency! Yay :) We received 3 notarized copies, 1 for the Dossier, 1 to keep and 1 that we sent to the USCIS (United States Citizenship and Immigration Services) This is the next phase in our waiting process. We have been warned by our agency that the time frame for the USCIS to process our paperwork from start to finish can be 1-3 months. This process includes them sending us a letter with an appointment for biometric fingerprints and than we receive a very important letter that is one of the most important documents that we will travel to China with. It will allow us to bring our baby girl back with us! So even though we are possibly three months away from receiving this very important letter the good news is that once we do receive it than we will have all the documents needed to complete our dossier. We have learned that baby steps our better than no steps at all.
As we wait for the government to check us out we have begun transitioning our home to make room for our new addition. It has always been the plan to have Pat's current office space as our second child's room. So we are making some changes and small renovations to go ahead and move Pat's office downstairs ( which I think he is totally stoked about). We are not naive in knowing that we may be waiting awhile for a referral for a child but we also don't want to wait and than be rushing to get everything done at one time. It melts my heart to walk into Pat's office now and know that one day we will finally have another child sleeping there.
This room is just across from Cameron's and he is very excited that their rooms will be so close. He has already told me how he will help her feel safe if she gets scared at bedtime. I can't wait for him to be a big brother!
So as we still have time to go, looking back at where we started we can see how far we've come. We can't control how long a lot of this process takes so we wait knowing that God already knows the day, and the hour that our child will be put into our arms.
Sunday, January 1, 2012
The story of our growing family
Happy New Year, and Hello 2012!
The ending of one year and the beginning of a new one is always a time for me to reflect on my life and what God has done in my life. When I look back on 2011 I am in awe of his work.
Those of you that know Pat and I,know that growing our family has never been a simple task. I always thought it would be. You grow up get married and have kids, that easy right? Unfortunately for us and so many other family it's not that simple.
Soon after Pat and I married we decided to start a family (we had already dated for 7years). Month after month past and no big news to announce. It was about that time that most people we knew were announcing their big news. We reached the year mark in trying to conceive and to our surprise we got pregnant!! WhooHoo! It appeared to be all part of God's amazing plan, we had just gotten settled in Charlotte so it seemed like perfect timing. We were on top of the world for a short 2 weeks until we miscarried:( Why would God allow this to happen? That is one answer I won't have until I get to heaven when I not only get to meet my creator but my precious baby also. At that time we were church hunting and I believe God led us to Hickory Grove the Sunday following our miscarriage. The sermon was about loving,trusting and praising God through troubled times. I remember them singing "Bleesed be the name of the Lord". When the line "You give and take away,but my heart will choose to say Blessed be your name" I knew than that without a doubt Pat and I were on a journey and no matter what Happened we would choose to trust our God!
We under went every test there was, all coming back with normal results yet still no pregnancy in sight. It wasn't the best of times but in some ways it was. Pat and I began growing as a family of three-Pat,me and God! Would we have grown as much spiritually if this trial had not come our way? I'm not so sure of that.
Long story short after 3 years and multiple IUI procedures, we were blessed with our amazing son Cameron!! Life with Cameron in our lives is simply awesome! We thank God for him everyday. Watching him grow is amazing. He's the cutest,funniest and sweetest little guy I know!
Well next came trying for baby #2. As we learned with Cameron, the best things in life don't come easy. We attempted for a few more years which us to the beginning of 2011. We had decided to switch doctors due to my insurance as a CHS employer gave me 100% coverage for fertility treatments. A blessing from God in itself! It was there we learned some heartbreaking news about my reproductive status that decreased my odds to conceive drastically. It was than that after a lot of prayer and discussions between Pat and I that we decided to undergo IVF. This had never been on the todo list but now it seemed our only hope.
We began 2011 with great anticipation. We felt an overwhelming peace from God that it was okay to proceed down the IVF path and were excited to hopefully get pregnant. Fromnthe beginning we could feel the Lord's hand on this procedure. Everything went smoothly. We weren't expected to have a lot of eggs and that was fine with us. We had prayed for only the amount that the Lord wanted us to have. Well the number was 2! Could we possibly have twins, oh my! Hey if that is what God had planned than bring it on! So for the first two months of 2011 all we could think about was the possibility of 3 young ones in the house.
I guess it was maybe silly to have been so hopeful after all the years of disappointment , butnthat had always been how we handled our infertility with renewed hope each month because we knew with God all things were possible.
Well it came as a crushing blow when we relealized that we would not be knowing these to babies here on earth either. Even our precious 3 year old could understand that mommy was sad she couldn't give him a brother or sister:(
Wow, for some reason I didn't see that being God's plan. I mean Pat and I both clearly could feel God all over the procedure. As the 2011 progressed the Lord started revealing to us his plan for our growing family and that he indeed was with us just with different plans than our own.
While we were trying to decide and praying about trying IVF again or what did God want us to do he began to show us in no uncertain terms what his plan was.
That plan was Adoption!
Hmm, well it was always there as a possible backup plan but we never really chose to make it anything more than that. Could we do it? Could we love an adopted child as much as our biological son? God clearly answered all these questions with an astounding YES! He began to Open our eyes wide and the topic of adoption was everywhere we turned. At times we couldn't help but be amazed at how often it happened. We were finally like okay God we get and Yes.
So as 2011 comes to and end and a bright new year is to here to embrace we find ourselves in the same spot we started the year, anticipating our growing family!
We are excited to be the majority of the way through the paper pregnancy of our adoption process and anticipate with great joy meeting our adopted daughter from China!
If you ever question if God really knows you I can attest that he knows you better than you know yourself. You see God was in fact with us during our IVF but not so that we could carry those children to term but so that we could have closure in knowing we did all we could and have no regrets. Having that closure is what has enabled us to not only hear but embrace God's call on our life to adopt. I am certain it will change not only our daughter's life but her daddy,mommy and brother's life in an amazing way!
Thank you God for giving us the gift of having the opportunity to adopt!
I look forward to keeping you posted on our progress! Please keep our family in your prayers- all four of us:)
E
The ending of one year and the beginning of a new one is always a time for me to reflect on my life and what God has done in my life. When I look back on 2011 I am in awe of his work.
Those of you that know Pat and I,know that growing our family has never been a simple task. I always thought it would be. You grow up get married and have kids, that easy right? Unfortunately for us and so many other family it's not that simple.
Soon after Pat and I married we decided to start a family (we had already dated for 7years). Month after month past and no big news to announce. It was about that time that most people we knew were announcing their big news. We reached the year mark in trying to conceive and to our surprise we got pregnant!! WhooHoo! It appeared to be all part of God's amazing plan, we had just gotten settled in Charlotte so it seemed like perfect timing. We were on top of the world for a short 2 weeks until we miscarried:( Why would God allow this to happen? That is one answer I won't have until I get to heaven when I not only get to meet my creator but my precious baby also. At that time we were church hunting and I believe God led us to Hickory Grove the Sunday following our miscarriage. The sermon was about loving,trusting and praising God through troubled times. I remember them singing "Bleesed be the name of the Lord". When the line "You give and take away,but my heart will choose to say Blessed be your name" I knew than that without a doubt Pat and I were on a journey and no matter what Happened we would choose to trust our God!
We under went every test there was, all coming back with normal results yet still no pregnancy in sight. It wasn't the best of times but in some ways it was. Pat and I began growing as a family of three-Pat,me and God! Would we have grown as much spiritually if this trial had not come our way? I'm not so sure of that.
Long story short after 3 years and multiple IUI procedures, we were blessed with our amazing son Cameron!! Life with Cameron in our lives is simply awesome! We thank God for him everyday. Watching him grow is amazing. He's the cutest,funniest and sweetest little guy I know!
Well next came trying for baby #2. As we learned with Cameron, the best things in life don't come easy. We attempted for a few more years which us to the beginning of 2011. We had decided to switch doctors due to my insurance as a CHS employer gave me 100% coverage for fertility treatments. A blessing from God in itself! It was there we learned some heartbreaking news about my reproductive status that decreased my odds to conceive drastically. It was than that after a lot of prayer and discussions between Pat and I that we decided to undergo IVF. This had never been on the todo list but now it seemed our only hope.
We began 2011 with great anticipation. We felt an overwhelming peace from God that it was okay to proceed down the IVF path and were excited to hopefully get pregnant. Fromnthe beginning we could feel the Lord's hand on this procedure. Everything went smoothly. We weren't expected to have a lot of eggs and that was fine with us. We had prayed for only the amount that the Lord wanted us to have. Well the number was 2! Could we possibly have twins, oh my! Hey if that is what God had planned than bring it on! So for the first two months of 2011 all we could think about was the possibility of 3 young ones in the house.
I guess it was maybe silly to have been so hopeful after all the years of disappointment , butnthat had always been how we handled our infertility with renewed hope each month because we knew with God all things were possible.
Well it came as a crushing blow when we relealized that we would not be knowing these to babies here on earth either. Even our precious 3 year old could understand that mommy was sad she couldn't give him a brother or sister:(
Wow, for some reason I didn't see that being God's plan. I mean Pat and I both clearly could feel God all over the procedure. As the 2011 progressed the Lord started revealing to us his plan for our growing family and that he indeed was with us just with different plans than our own.
While we were trying to decide and praying about trying IVF again or what did God want us to do he began to show us in no uncertain terms what his plan was.
That plan was Adoption!
Hmm, well it was always there as a possible backup plan but we never really chose to make it anything more than that. Could we do it? Could we love an adopted child as much as our biological son? God clearly answered all these questions with an astounding YES! He began to Open our eyes wide and the topic of adoption was everywhere we turned. At times we couldn't help but be amazed at how often it happened. We were finally like okay God we get and Yes.
So as 2011 comes to and end and a bright new year is to here to embrace we find ourselves in the same spot we started the year, anticipating our growing family!
We are excited to be the majority of the way through the paper pregnancy of our adoption process and anticipate with great joy meeting our adopted daughter from China!
If you ever question if God really knows you I can attest that he knows you better than you know yourself. You see God was in fact with us during our IVF but not so that we could carry those children to term but so that we could have closure in knowing we did all we could and have no regrets. Having that closure is what has enabled us to not only hear but embrace God's call on our life to adopt. I am certain it will change not only our daughter's life but her daddy,mommy and brother's life in an amazing way!
Thank you God for giving us the gift of having the opportunity to adopt!
I look forward to keeping you posted on our progress! Please keep our family in your prayers- all four of us:)
E
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